SUNAAD RAGHURAM writes: English as a language has always confounded, confused, perplexed, bewildered, foxed and puzzled most of us Indians. Long years of British rule have nevertheless imprinted the Anglican tongue quite irrevocably on our national psyche.

Speak English we must and write it, we will. Should it matter if it’s not exactly what the Queen of England would nod and approve!

Check this out.

Scanning the menu in the up-market Grand Maurya resort on Hunsur road, I burst out in convulsive laughter.

My eyes zeroed in on a dish that for a moment I felt, had been picked straight out of the ancient recipe book of the not-so-friendly grandmother of the headman of the cannibalistic tribe that perhaps lived in the depths of the Congo, some 152 years ago!!

The resort had manicured lawns, smiling faces and a friendly service, all so full of tender courtesies.

BUT… Under Chinese, it said, Balls: Human Style!!!

Yes, you read that right, Balls: Human Style.

Gosh, I frantically rummaged my wallet. For money. To the onlooker, I surely would have looked terribly desperate. Phew, I found some crisp notes.

What if, just if, I had had a hearty meal comprising my usual malai kofta and aloo parathas and realised that I had forgotten my wallet for the day!

Do you think you would have still ordered anything Chinese that day!!!!

Although the friend who had accompanied me for dinner that fateful day kept insisting that it was only Hunan that the menu meant!!

To err is Hunan….and all that, eh!