Reality is an illusion caused by alcohol deficiency

SWAROOP DEV forwards this doggerel from Dubai:

***

BECOZ’ I NEVER TAKE RISK

I never take risk while drinking

When I come from office in the evening, wife is cooking

I can hear the noise of utensils in the kitchen

I stealthily enter the house

Take out the bottle from my black cupboard

Shivaji Maharaj is looking at me from the photo-frame

But still no one is aware of it

Becoz’ I never take risk…

*

I take out the glass from the rack above the old sink

Quickly enjoy one peg

Wash the glass and keep it again on the rack

Of course I also keep the bottle inside my cupboard

Shivaji Maharaj is giving a smile

*

I peep into the kitchen

Wife is cutting potatoes

No one is aware of what I did

Becoz’ I never take risk…

*

I: Any news on Iyer‘s daughter’s marriage

She: Nope, she doesn’t seem to be that lucky. Still they are looking out for her

*

I again come out; there is a small noise of the black cupboard

But I don’t make any sound while taking out the bottle

I take out the glass from the old rack above sink

Quickly enjoy one peg

Wash the bottle and keep it in the sink

Also keep the Black Glass in the cupboard

But still no one is aware of what I did

Becoz’ I never take risk…

*

I: But still I think Iyer’s daughter’s age is not that much

She: What are you saying? She is 28 yrs old… like an aged horse

I: (I forgot her age is 28) Oh, Oh…

*

I again take out potatoes out from my black cupboard

But the cupboard’s place has automatically changed

I take out the bottle from the rack and quickly enjoy one peg in the sink

Shivaji Maharaj laughs loudly

I keep the rack in the potatoes and wash Shivaji Maharaj’s photo and keep it in the black cupboard

Wife is keeping the sink on the stove

But still no one is aware of what I did

Becoz’ I never take risk ..

*

I: (getting angry) you call Mr Iyer a horse? If you say that again, I will cut your tongue…!

She: Don’t just blabber something, go out and sit quietly…

I take out the bottle from the potatoes

Go in the black cupboard and enjoy a peg

Wash the sink and keep it over the rack

Wife is giving a smile

Shivaji Maharaj is still cooking

But still no one is aware of what I did

Becoz’ I never take risk ..

*

I: (laughing) So Iyer is marrying a horse!!

She: Hey go and sprinkle some water on your face…

*

I again go to the kitchen, and quietly sit on the rack

Stove is also on the rack

There is a small noise of bottles from the room outside

I peep and see that wife is enjoying a peg in the sink

But none of the horses are aware of what i did

Becoz’ Shivaji Maharaj never takes risk.