After 12 days, the Australian Police have done POTA proponents proud and decided that a slim card that Dr Mohammed Haneef gave to Sabeel Ahmed, which may or not have been used by his brother Kafeel Ahmed, is enough of a case for him to be charged of “recklessness” in the Glasgow plot.
Delightful irony that—Australians accusing somebody else of recklessness.
Haneef reportedly reacted with shock at the news, and his wife has now petitioned the prime minister, ours not theirs. However, it is a possibility, although a remote one, that this is a serious case of misunderstanding and that the Aussie cops haven’t quite understand the good doctor, late of Mudigere, who speaks the Queen’s English as it must be spoken.
So, in case they are watching, here goes a public service message, tongue firmly rolled in both cheeks, from churumuri.com in the only language Australians understand: their bloody slang.
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What da ya know, you yobbos. Haneef‘s no wetback wog or westie, he’s a bonza wombat. Even blind Freddie could see that.
You ratbags may wallop him yonks. You may stick him up a gum tree, take him up shit creek, but this SIM thingy’s a piffle, a yarn that even barney Warnie couldn’t spin.
What’s the Rafferty’s Rules the sausage short of a barbecue cops are playing with, mate?
Struth!
Next thing we know, you grommets will be saying Haneef gave a half a kg of maida to Kafeel‘s ol’ cheese on the arvo of the day he left for down under. Maida? Powder you put in the billy, you bloody drongos, to make dough for the chook or sanga.
You have had him for a bush week. Didn’t Haneef also tell you that he lent a Hero Puch with a middy of gas to Sabeel when he wanted to go to a tuckshop in Tavarekere?
Or that there was half-a-pot of milk in the fridge which Haneef had left behind which Kafeel may have used exactly a year while taking one for the road to Glasgow Airport?
Or that Khafeel had put his bolt in Haneef‘s dacks.
Come, come. Don’t say you didn’t know we Indians are tighter than a fish’s bumhole that we scrap and save and share and spare?
Jingoes!
Frankly, you bloody bludgers, you gotta put more avagoyermug—more yacka, if you want it that way—to crack namma huduga. Get stuffed. Get some hair of the dog.
It’s still not too late to do a uwie.
Orright, get your arse into gear. It looks daggy, not the full quid. Use your loaf, mate. If you’ve found nothing more than a SIM card after the backroom waltz, you will probably find nothing. Don’t ever have the civilised world look at you and ask, “Who opened their lunch?”
Rack off.
Hooroo.
BTW: didn’t you know Mark and Shane split a thali with Mukesh?
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Check it out: The dictionary of Australian slang
Words Americans should avoid saying to Australasians
If they could frame something on Dr. Haneef on the SIM Card business, then umpires Aleem Dar, Sheppard etal should have banned Mcgrath , warne and ‘Lily’ white Mark Waugh from playing cricket forever.And also their P.M. Howard – whom their ex-P.M. calls ‘Hitler’ – a nosey parker whose main occupation sometimes used to be Murali-baiting.
You lil ripper!
Put the shrimp on the barbie and have it off with your Shiela mate!
I am Australian and that was great. We don’t actually speak like that, but nonetheless, it was hilarious to read.
Please remember though, not all Australians agree with the Howard Government or the Australian Federal Police, quite the opposite actually. Most of us down here are sharply aware of the way the law has been perverted for the sake of the War on Terror. We had to put up with the travesty of the David Hicks case recently, we know how low our government can go. I am personally extremely outraged by the charge against Haneef, and it is a stark realization of how vulnerable we all are under these ridiculous laws, if it can happen to him, it can happen to any of us. Over a stupid little sim card for crying out loud! Unbelievable.
Hey in terrorism, you are guilty until proven innocent. So this guy gives his sim to his cousin who is a terrorist and we should do an ostrich and say that until he has been absolutely absolutely proven to be guilty he is innocent?? Come on. Dont be so naive. In this case he doesnt get the benefit of doubt.
It is not surprising…
austaralia originally was a dumping ground for criminals…rest of the world used to pack off criminals to faraway australia! you dont expect much of justice from criminals…
Why is churumuri espousing the cause of the terrorists so much? Can you give a platform to people who support the action of Aussie police too? Vinutha Mallya’s articles are outrageous. People like Haneef are better witheld till they are proven innocent. There seem to be enough links to point an association with Haneef and Ahmeds. And it is publicly known that one of the Ahmeds did indeed launch a suicide attack.
Why are we being so chicken hearted to support an anti-terrorism drive?
hey, is this abt terrorism or abt cricket (our ONLY passion, it looks). Pray, why should anything and everything be connected to cricket – maybe because we can’t beat the Australians in the field, we take sadistic pleasure in denouncing them everywhere else.
As Rajeev says, why is churumuri espousing the cause of terrorists? And, yes, why do we support terrorism?
The Haneef guy ‘s terrorism- supporting trail extends into three continents. Reading some replies in this blog, I am amazed how some simply forget the
carnage that would have visited onto innocent travellers in Glasgow and innocent pedestrians in London by the Ahmeds who Haneef supported. Let us for a moment assume that all these activities had taken place in Saudi Arabia, Libya or Syria, Haneef and his friends by now would be resting 30 feet under the ground minus their heads.
.Australian government has nothing to gain by torturing Dr. Haneef. It is the chicken hearted over sensitive reaction towards the much dreaded terrorism that has landed them in soup. It is high time for them to restore the rights of the doctor at the earliest instead of prolonging his detention on one pretext or other. No one can expect any government other than India to handle the terror issue with kid’s gloves. Procuring the clinching evidence before detaining a person is a normal practice but in case of Haneef, the concerned authorities appear to grope in the darkness to substantiate their charges against him at any cost. Absolutely they have no need to offer justification for what they have done in national interest. The honorable way is to release him instantly with dignity.