Coming soon: Reliance Hair-Cutting Saloons?

Our Lactose-Deficient Correspondent in East Delhi reports that he has started drinking “Reliance Milk” from today. A half-litre packet of full cream milk, branded Dairy Pure, costing Rs 13 and made by Reliance Dairy Foods with its offices in Bombay, landed at his doorstep while he was asleep.

Tongue firmly in both cheeks, OLDCED writes: 

“After textile fabrics, petrol, petrochemicals, plastics, power, vegetables, wellness, mobile phones, mutual funds, chappals, groceries, books, spectacles and broom sticks, the mighty empire of Mukesh Ambani and Anil Ambani has deigned to sell me doodh.

“Only two things remain untouched by Dhirubhai Ambani‘s sons: haircutting saloons and autorickshaws. If India legalises the sex trade, Reliance will be the first to bid for it, too. After that we can stop holding elections and ask Reliance to bid for the government.

“A modh bania from Porbandar called Mohandas Karamchand Gandhi wanted to fetch us self-reliance. What the modh banias called the Ambanis from Chorwad are giving us is Reliance, plain and simple.”

Photograph: courtesy India Retail Biz

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