E.R. RAMACHANDRAN writes: Once upon a time there was a Class Monitor. He had been appointed Class Monitor as the school teachers thought he was honest, sincere and hard-working.
His duties were to see that the chalk pieces and dusters were readily available in the class. He was also supposed to wipe the black board clean and keep the classroom tidy. He was to be a role model for the other students in the class.
To help the Class Monitor in his work, the school had assigned some students to work with him. From time to time he would go to the office clerk to replenish the stocks.
In the beginning the Class Monitor was honest, sincere and hardworking. But after some time, he started taking his job lightly. He procured more chalk pieces than required from the school store and started distributing the extra pieces to his friends and family.
Since he was paying less and less attention in class and studying less and less at home, the Class Monitor donated some red-colored chalk pieces to temples hoping God would make him pass the exams and complete the term.
He was also not keeping the class tidy any more, and began distributing dusters of 2″x3″ and 2″x4″ size, mostly to his family members, brothers and sister. He also started distributing mops of 9″x9″ and 12″x12″ which were basically given to swab the classroom.
Soon, other boys in the school as well as the office clerk noticed that dusters and mops were missing, but since he was the Class Monitor, nobody dared complain against him.
Into this class, in the middle of the term, came a High Ranking Bully. The High Ranking Bully was related to the school governess. Since he had the support of the governess, the High Ranking Bully, started troubling the CM.
He started picking up fights with the Class Monitor on each and every issue. Some students whom he befriended informed the High Ranking Bully about the pilferage of chalk pieces, dusters and mops.
He started openly challenging the authority of the CM in the class. The Class Monitor took on the High Ranking Bully and they had several skirmishes rolling over each other in the classroom itself just before the teachers came to the classroom.
Even the teachers were afraid of the High Ranking Bully as the governess was very powerful. They were all afraid of her.
The High Ranking Bully complained to the office clerk about the missing dusters as well as chalks periodically given to the Class Monitor’s custody. When confronted, the Class Monitor justified his action saying all previous Class Monitors had done the same and he had not done anything different.
Amidst all this fight, the class started stinking as it was ages since the classroom was swept and washed. Cobwebs appeared in the corners. Teachers had to endure the stench that emanated from the classroom.
The Class Monitor’s only objective now was to somehow complete the term. The High Ranking Bully however was determined to have him dismissed bringing all his influence for the fight which looked like going to the finish.
There was, thus a stalemate.
Finally, the class mustered enough strength of its own. They had had enough of the Class Monitor and The High Ranking Bully. They decided their class was more important than both of them.
One day, they came with brooms, washing powder and water. They cleaned the class room thoroughly, removed the cobwebs and it was sparkling clean again. Finally, with their new broom they swept both the Class Monitor and the High Ranking Bully out of the classroom.
In a clean well-swept classroom, without the trouble- makers, the lessons now could start again.
ERR, That’s a good one – but I thought that the Governess & High Ranking Bully tried to influence the Class students by asking them to take a rally in the school premises on a Sunday – never mind the chaos that it could create for students attending special classes!!
You probably forgot to mention CM’s (Class Monitor’s) drama of crying in front of the class because of his incompetency, wiping his tears, running to the BJP (Baalakara Jana Pratinidhi) leaders complaining on the treatment meted out by the other earlier contenders for CM’s post as well.
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Splendid piece ERR sir. I wish the last para would come true. But you would agree unfortunately it won’t. The class may get a new Class Monitor but he will be similar or worse – no way better. Perhaps the class deserves only such monitors!
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Too Good. Only wish the last part after the Stalemate comes true. Right now it looks like a masala movie climax
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Decent attempt at a parable. However, too literal for my taste.
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Hurrah!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Success at last.
More Power to your Elbow
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your style reminds me of george orwell’s “animal farm.” it is beautiful!
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Excellent piece. Wish the drama ends as ERR has narrated! Broomstick bashing!!
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Class Monitor = UPA (Un Productive Alliance) Administration; the Cabinet
High Ranking Bully = National Coordination Authority; the super cabinet run out of Sonia’s living room
People = voters of Karnataka, Gujarat etc., who one day will vote both the CM and the High Ranking Bully out of office.
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Good effort.Am from TN,the land of kazhagams.Cannot differentiate how your imbecile is worse than our crooked thatha? We have rotten apples everywhere.The poor in this country have already given up, the rich do not care and there is plenty in Bangalore.Unfortunately, the bunch which is passing off as the “hindutva” party has the most trust of the middle class hindus which still believes there is a chance but then given half a chance as in Karnataka, the hindutva brigade has followed the good old crooked path of the italian mafia.All in the name of hindutva!!So which is better? italian mafia or the hindutva mafia? Shit is flying everywhere in this land of milk and honey.
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ROFL :-)
And now, the Class Monitor says he is scared to go from home to school imagining that his jealous classmates would kill him through black magic.
If a Class Monitor is so insecure, always hallucinating about black magic, crying in front of TV cameras, how can he be a good leader?
Why can’t the Class Monitor take action against those who are trying to kill him? After all that is why he has been put in that chair. To monitor other students. Instead of monitoring them, he complains to the world that they are trying to kill him.
Is all this public whining the signs of a decisive leader? Or does this Class Monitor think that whining will win him the votes of gullible students?
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Good article!!
But…..!!!!!
The pupils in the class are morons. They are divided amongst themselves on basis of caste, money and interests. Each of them have their own agendas. They can never unite to clean up the mess. They deserve such CMs. I think the future is similar.
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I think the class monitor has gone MAD.
It’s utter “madness”…!!!! He is suffering from paranoid psychosis. It’s time for him to leave the class and be admitted to mental hospital. It’s a shame on us we elect these people who believe maaya, maata, manthra, This suggests why we are called developing. I feel we are not developing for the future. But going backwards in time. Bloody CM is just using all his tactics to remain in power. If this had happened elsewhere..
People would have killed this man. This CM is nothing but a sick criminal.
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Great piece, ERR. May I also add that the witty and humorous accounts of the happenings in the school provided by one of the students, Ever Ready Reviewer, made sure that the rest of the class still maintained their sanity.
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“The pupils in the class are morons. They are divided amongst themselves on basis of caste, money and interests. Each of them have their own agendas. They can never unite to clean up the mess. They deserve such CMs. I think the future is similar.” –
The best assessment of my fellow countrymen/women..All mediocre countries are having the maximum number of disunited shortsighted crooked so called “common” people.Inida is thatha Praja yathaa Raja
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Shiv and Simple: Well said. Now the latest – A well wisher of Class Monitor from Bhanda Janagala Palya has said that drunkards should be respected because Bhimsen Joshi was a drunkard, without drinking he was not able to sing – something to that effect. My head is aching. I banged my head against a wall several times after reading it in yesterday’s newspapers. Do we really need them, deserve them!
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Very thought provoking!
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