9 reasons why Navjot Singh Sidhu is right when he says he is more comfortable in Pakistan than South India

Brain-dead TV channels and BJP spokesmen, which are one and the same most nights of the seven-day week, are needlessly taking offence at Navjot Singh Sidhu‘s comment that he feels more at home in Pakistan than South India.

Sidhu is quoted as saying at a lit fest in Kasauli:

# that he cannot understand more than a couple of words in Tamil;

# that he likes idli and dosa but cannot handle them for too long;

# that one abuse in Punjabi is more powerful than 10 words in English.

Sidhu’s quip is apparently so shocking that a BJP spokesman, yes, actually, a BJP spokesman of all people, calls it an “absolute insult to India’s rich diversity” in which he gratuitously includes language and culture but not religion.

A Shiromani Akali Dal motormouth-ini calls Sidhu an “ISI agent”, no less.

But wait….

“Sherry” is right and we, “Madrasis”—and Kannadigans and Telugulus and Kerals—should proudly agree with him and lend him our support.

After all…

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1
We make “ragi aloo parotta” unlike Ponderosa in Karachi which makes “itli sambar”.

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2.
We just wear Paragon or VKC chappals on our feet. Sala, they make chappal kababs and sweep us off our feet.

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3.
Their TV anchors have simple names like Hamid Mir. We have to deal with all 47 letters of Nammudi Vellasithan Sinnaiah Senthil Chengalvarayan (right, sorry, left).

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4.
We just have a Karachi Bakery in Hyderabad. They have a real Karachi in Karachi.

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5.
Their 11th President’s name was simple and easy to understand: “Mr 10 per cent”. Our 11th President was Avul Pakir Jainulabdeen Abdul Kalam.

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6.
Of course, Mika Singh sounds better than in Punjabi than in Telugu. And Harris Jayaraj‘s qawwali can’t hold a candle.

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7.
And, behen chod is so much simpler than trying to say ‘Nin hendruna kaiya‘:

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8.
Pakistan was an early mover in match-fixing. Hyderabad-born Asif Iqbal was into it much earlier than Hyderabad-born Mohammed Azharuddin.

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9
The Anwar Ratol mangoes are much better than Alphonso (but only if you haven’t bitten into an Avakaya pickles).