(HEART) BREAKING NEWS: ADVANI SWORN IN

Al Gore is “the former next president of the United States”, and he says so himself, tongue firmly in giant cheek. After the 2009 general elections, Lalchand Kishinchand Advani is clearly “the former future prime minister of India“, except that no one in his party, least of all Advani, has the sense, humour or the sense of humour to say that.

On his newly launched spoof site, Noise of India, Mysorean GAUTAMA P. fills this vital hole in the democratic discourse, with a item designed to make all those who mourn this cruel twist of fate feel good, at least in cyberspace.

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“Ad-vani, the most clicked online Ad in Indian political history, was formally sworn in as India’s online PM on an undisclosed Google server. The ceremony was witnessed by hundreds of online ads including Jet Airways, bharat matrimony and Dominos Pizza.

“Security was tight, and all the ads had to pass through a firewall before being ushered into the RAM area. The installation went off smoothly, despite some angry heckling by the RAM’s step-motherboard and Dravidian parties raking up the south-bridge issue.

“Later, addressing a gathering of RSS feeds, Ad-vani vowed to focus on core ideological issues like Bangladeshi spam and bovine intercourse on the Discovery channel. He noted that the party was currently going through its worst phase of Rahulkala.

“Next, logging on to Facebook, he lustily superpoked Manmohan Singh and invited him to a game of pseudo-ku. He ignored Uma Bharati‘s friend request and banged his head on Sudheendra Kulkarni‘s wall. On Orkut he deleted Varun Gandhi‘s scraps and posted a video of him deleting Varun Gandhi’s scraps. Finally, sensing the restlessness of the youth, he tweeted: “from now on, no more Mandir, only Mandira.”

Visit the site: Noise of India

Photograph: courtesy The Associated Press

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